 2009 BMW X6 xDrive50i. Click image to enlarge |
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2009 BMW X6
When: The not-too-distant future
Where: The Museum of the Internal Combustion Engine, Petrolia, Ontario
What: Special Exhibit – 2009 BMW X6 xDrive50i
Who: A grade six school group is exposed to the wonders of early 21st century indulgence.
Hello, children. My name is Mister B, and I’ll be your guide today. This big black apparition before you is a rare 2009 BMW X6 xDrive50i. It looks like it could eat your whole family, doesn’t it? But don’t be scared. These lived on gasoline, and we all know what happened to that stuff. Does anybody know what species this is? Greg?
“Is it an SUV?”
Nope. How ‘bout you, Jil?
 2009 BMW X6 xDrive50i. Click image to enlarge |
“Is it a crossover?”
Close. It’s a SAC, which stands for Sport Activity Coupe. We still don’t know what that means.
“But aren’t coupes supposed to have only two doors?”
Very good, Grant. Now, children, let’s talk about the internal combustion engine that lurks behind the twin-kidney grill. Bavarian Motor Works, and I stress the word motor, were expert engine builders. Car enthusiasts loved their mills, and this twin-turbo direct-injection aluminum 4.4-litre V8, which was introduced in the $78,100 2009 X6 xDrive50i and $112,900 750i sedan, was a corker. It generated 400 horsepower and 450 lb-ft of torque from 1,800 to 4,500 r.p.m. It ripped this SUV… er, SAC to 100 km/h in only 5.6 seconds, and broadcast a song the likes of which hasn’t been heard on this planet for decades.
Can anybody tell me how many cylinders are in a V8 engine?
“Two?”
No, Chris. How about you, Peter?
“Three?”
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at 6:28 am
Wow , this “thing” ranks right up there with the Cayenne Turbo S. I saw one double parked in Yorkville , a good place for it.
at 7:20 am
Very funny, beautifully written and tells us all the important stuff about the vehicle. Congrats and thanks.
at 8:31 am
I love this article, it is very funny. Oh and I like the X6 too
at 9:37 am
Not sure what’s the use of this “thing”. It’s ugly, it’s useless and it costs a lot of money. Off course unless if you want to show off. Yes. got it now.
at 10:40 am
Those seats do look quite amazing. I’m not a fan of those shifter tabs on the steering wheel on any car though. They should all be replaced by fixed paddles on the steering column. Right for up, left for down. In this car I would probably end up using the cell phone BMW uses as a shifter to manually change gears.
at 10:47 am
Best article i have read on here in a long time. Funny but with all the facts. Keep up the good work.
at 2:17 pm
I like the car!
I did not like the article. If your intention was for it to look like it was written by a 10th grade student, then congratulations!
at 2:25 pm
The article fits as you can only fit 10th grade students inside that thing
at 3:27 pm
Absolutely hysterical. The ad slogan should read: “For those seeking to compensate for their shortcomings – the all new X6 has arrived”
at 8:56 pm
Peter B,
Great article – turn it into a children’s song !
Seems like this article was written by a musician !
(great musician/great article)
I cant believe that these types of vehicles are still being made – what year is it?
Subaru Bass Guy
at 10:20 pm
I think this was cheeky and well written. Nice job.
From the moment I saw this, I thought it was an absolute styling disaster – not quite Pontiac Aztec bad but certainly not up to BMW standards. There is a market for this vehicle – unfortunately for BMW it is not a very large population.
Here’s a chuckle. The inspiration for BMW’s SAV:
http://www.arpem.com/coches/coches/ssangyong/actyon/flash/ssang-yong-actyon-lat.jpg
http://www.leblogauto.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/04/Olivier_Duquesne/SsangYong%20Actyon%20(2).JPG
This car debuted in 2006 before BMW. Both not pleasing to the eye in my opinion..
at 7:34 pm
Haha! It’s actually quite similar. Thanks Alex.
at 11:48 pm
Most welcome~
at 3:48 pm
BMW knows how to make cars. Everything they make is of highest quality and is well-thought out. They don’t joke around with car-making, maybe that’swhy they’re so successful. Here in America, we could learn a lot from the german way of making cars. We would all gain a lot from it.